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How to Use a Condum
Posted:Sep 14, 2018 1:57 pm
Last Updated:Nov 17, 2018 10:55 pm
677 Views

My first time!!

I recall my first time with a condom, I was 16 or so. I went in to buy a packet of condoms at the pharmacy. There was this beautiful woman assistant behind the counter, and she could see that
I was new at it. She handed me the package and asked if I knew how to wear one. I honestly answered, "No, this is my first time."
So she unwrapped the package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb. She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure. I apparently still looked confused. So she looked all around the store to see if it was empty. It was empty.
"Just a minute," she said, and walked to the door, and locked it. Taking my hand, she led me into the back room, unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked her bra and laid it aside. "Do these excite you?" she asked. Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do was nod my head. She then said it was time to slip the condom on. As I was slipping it on, she dropped her skirt, removed her panties and lay down on a desk.
"Well, come on", she said, "We don't have much time."
So I climbed on her. It was so wonderful, that unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW, I was done within a few minutes.
She looked at me with a bit of a frown. "Did you put that condom on?" she asked.
I said, "I sure did," and held up my thumb to show her. She fainted.


ooops
6 Comments
No Free Lunch
Posted:Sep 14, 2018 1:55 pm
Last Updated:Nov 17, 2018 10:55 pm
573 Views

Once upon a time, Tanstaafl was made king of all the lands. His first act was to call his economic advisers and tell them to write up all the economic knowledge the society possessed. After years of work, they presented their monumental effort: 25 volumes, each about 400 pages long. But in the interim, King Tanstaafl had become a very busy man, what with running a kingdom of all the lands and all. Looking at the lengthy volumes, he told his advisers to summarize their findings in one volume. Despondently, the economists returned to their desks, wondering how they could summarize what they’d been so careful to spell out. After many more years of rewriting, they were finally satisfied with their one-volume effort, and tried to make an appointment to see the king. Unfortunately, affairs of state had become even more pressing than before, and the king couldn’t take the time to see them. Instead he sent word to them that he couldn’t be bothered with a whole volume, and ordered them, under threat of death (for he had become a tyrant), to reduce the work to one sentence. The economists returned to their desks, shivering in their sandals and pondering their impossible task. Thinking about their fate if they were not successful, they decided to send out for one last meal. Unfortunately, when they were collecting money to pay for the meal, they discovered they were broke. The disgusted delivery man took the last meal back to the restaurant, and the economists started down the path to the beheading station. On the way, the delivery man’s parting words echoed in their ears. They looked at each other and suddenly they realized the truth. “We’re saved!” they screamed. “That’s it! That’s economic knowledge in one sentence!” They wrote the sentence down and presented it to the king, who thereafter fully understood all economic problems. (He also gave them a good meal.) The sentence? There Ain’t No Such Thing As A Free Lunch— TANSTAAFL
ECONOMIC KNOWLEDGE IN ONE SENTENCE: TANSTAAFL
Economic reasoning is based on the premise that everything has a cost

CRS's correlation: You have to give up something to get something else.
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The Power of a Badge
Posted:Sep 14, 2018 1:49 pm
Last Updated:Nov 17, 2018 10:55 pm
567 Views

A WV Sheriff stops at a farm in rural WV and talks with an old farmer.

He tells the farmer, "I need to inspect your farm for illegally grown drugs."

The old farmer says, "Okay, but don't go in that field over there."

The Sheriff verbally explodes saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the Sheriffs Department with me." Reaching into his rear pants pocket and removing his badge. The officer proudly displays it to the farmer. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish on any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?"

The old farmer nods politely and goes about his chores.

Later, the old farmer hears loud screams and spies the Sheriff running for his life and close behind is the farmer's bull. With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer. The Sheriff is clearly terrified..

The old farmer immediately throws down
his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs..... !
"Your badge! Show him your badge!"
0 Comments

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How to Use a Condum (6)pocogato12
Sep 14, 2018 9:31 pm